Goff Morgan - Adventures In Hack Poetry

A repository for the poetry of Goff Morgan, the one and only Newport Town Poet. Goff was the only official town poet in Wales from 1997 to 2000, and since then has continued in an informal capacity to write commissioned verse for BBC Radio Wales, and others.

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Location: Newport, Gwent, United Kingdom

I trained as an actor in the early eighties, and performed my own one-man shows until 2000. I was made Newport Town Poet in 1997, and have broadcast on BBC Radio Wales since 1991. My first solo programme for Radio Wales was "Goff At The Pictures", and I've recently completed a two parter called "Goff's Guiding Principles".

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Three New Nursery Rhymes, and One Extra

These three new nursery rhymes were written for the Nicola Heywood Thomas phone-in programme on BBC Radio Wales.

A recent tongue-in-cheek report had revealed that children are exposed to ten times more violence in traditional nursery rhymes that in post water-shed television.

The Early Learning Centre also suggested that new nursery rhymes be written to be more appropriate to the New Millennium.

I'm not sure this is what they were after!

The extra poem occured to me on the way home in the car after the programme had been broadcast, but as I'm still giggling about it, I though I'd post it here. Humpty, Hamble and Little Ted were all soft toys used in the now defunct kids' programme "Playschool" (Hamble was a horrible plastic pig-faced baby doll with a tight black perm!)

What Big Ted thought when he found out about it, history has not recorded.

1. A Proverb.

Whether it's fat,
Or whether it's thin,
Eat not a cow
With the spine left in!

2. Strangers.

Never speak to strangers,
Though statistics clearly show
We'll probably be murdered
By somebody we know.

3. Cotton Wool.

Wrap your child in cotton wool,
And before it's very old
It'll know the world's more scary
Than ever it's been told!


Humpty & Hamble.

Humpty & Hamble were happy,
Until the day he said
He couldn't "extend their relationship"
`Cos he'd married Little Ted.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nice story.

: )

Download Nursery Rhymes MP3


10:45 am  

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